In Times Which Seem Like Self-Psychotherapy He Says To Himself:
Oh, Vienna

Novel: Times 1–4, Chapter 56 We are very pleased with our selections

Niet van der Zand
6 min readMay 31

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We walk back to the hotel beside the moonlit river, we stop, quite often, to cuddle, to kiss; this is one more good night, in one really wonderful life. It was after ten on Saturday morning before we surfaced; we did stay awake, we did make love, we did find our sleep, we did lay comfortably, we rested, free of complications, together.

I take a shower, Dinah takes a bath, I stroke her shoulder, she watches me shave; we are as one in our clothes, we are as one out of our clothes. Not a thing then to come between us; we are relaxed, we are happy, we are almost satisfied to be naked. I say to Dinah that I would like to go buy, or hire some clothes for this evening. Why, where are we going, Dinah asks.

It’s a surprise I respond, oh good she says, I like surprises. But before we go I want to show you a piece from the book you lent me. Dinah opens Mademoiselle de Maupin at page one hundred and twenty; let me read to you, she says smiling: I have never asked anything from women except beauty. I can very well make do without intelligence and soul. A woman with beauty is always intelligent as far as I am concerned. She has the intelligence to be beautiful and I do not know any equal to that. You have to be a brilliant conversationalist and scintillatingly witty to equal the flashing of beautiful eyes.

I would like to explore, with you, the few pages from where this excerpt is taken, Dinah says, but not right now, later, after we’ve been shopping, or maybe tomorrow. But for now pray tell; do you think me beautiful, or intelligent, or soulful; what do you expect of me as I get older?

I squeeze her hand, smile into her eyes, and say: yes, yes tomorrow will be fine. I telephone Theaterkunst, and make an appointment to visit their store, to choose some contemporary, inspirational clothing for this evening.

We take the subway to Eisenzahnstraße, walk down a side street, to the graffiti covered warehouse; we are not disappointed with the stock. Dinah chooses a turquoise and rust, shuffled-silk, Dupion dress, with a sparkling silver, green, and copper striped jacket, finished…

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Niet van der Zand

words often hidden from ones inner self